We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.
Word up, Lincoln… word up.
I met Bill Nye on a plane in 1999. Here he is inventing the selfie.
Bill Nye invented the selfie.
bill nye the selfie guy
I think I’m the only female who hates feminists.
yes, congratulations, tumblr user mysticfawn, you are the only female on planet earth who has internalized misogyny to the extent that you think feminism is a bad thing
this is completely unprecedented in all of time and all of space and not at all a distressing but commonly observed cultural phenomenon
i will call the authorities to record this extremely shocking occurrence
things you don’t point out about people:
- body hair in places you’re not used to it being???
- fat rolls/curves
- how much/how little they’re eating
- how skinny they are/what bones they can see because of how skinny they are
- How fat they are.
- If they have crooked or misaligned teeth maybe even yellowed
- If they sweat a lot
don’t do it
WOMEN: please wear high heels unless you don’t know how to walk in high heels in which case stay home and softly gnaw on bottles of shampoo
also please show no less than 64.87% of your boob and no more than 27.94%
stop having arms
when people ask you to smile, blowjob them
my tummy itches make that stop
i will think of new problems for you to have tomorrow
my drunken need to show affection finds a new outlet